So, did my value just go up or down?

Someone’s first response to that question might be to shake his or her head and say, “Can’t tell. Haven’t checked the stock market.” Or someone more cynical, “If it’s anything past 65, then forget about the market. There’s no question. Your value just went down!”

In today’s society, one’s sense of value is often tied to personal wealth, or the lack thereof. For others it’s the physical aspect of aging that is the marker. No longer being able to look like or do what we did when we were younger, it is easy to feel devalued, pushed aside. Even something as innocuous as operating a DVD player or a computer can be intimidating.

One thing is for certain. Modern culture places a high value on youth and technology. Instinctively as we age, we push back. Are you 50? Happy birthday. You don’t look a day over 49! You’re chagrined when you look in the mirror, though. No matter the effort and money spent on looking 30 or 40-something, the truth is you don’t. Looking as good as we can at whatever age we may be is not a sin. But obsessing over the aging process can be. And being devalued in my mind or by others simply because I am older, definitely is.

So what can be done about raising my value, my healthy sense of self-worth as a Christ follower in today’s church and society? Let’s take a look.

 

If, while at your birthday party an alert, intuitive 25-year-old finds herself in a room filled with ‘old people,’ it may not be their knowledge, experience, or judgment that will be her lasting takeaway. It will be that these people are in a very real sense that 25-year-old at a later point in life. Hanging out with older folk can be valuable, if for no other reason, simply because it gives a look into the future as to what one’s own experience will some day be. In an extraordinary way, we are to that young woman a room filled with stories, a library of lives, waiting to be opened and read.

Some of my friends in their later years are resistant to change, refusing to adapt to the world that is changing around us all. They say “enough already,” stop learning and turn a deaf ear (sometimes literally) to anything new. They become roadblocks instead of avenues. But here is the reality. When we resist adapting, put and end to learning new things, it is difficult for others to believe that we may have any worthwhile wisdom to impart. So, rightfully, they move on to people in their 60s, 70s and older who have continued growing and remain engaged.

These are the elders who enjoy life, are a pleasure to be around, and display a beauty and dignity that ensures they will never stop being valued by people of any age. To maintain our relevance, we must distinguish between fantasy and reality, recognize what makes us different, unique, and then focus on that, leaving the rest for someone else.

Like or not, we are deeply embedded in the information age. It has overtaken us like a tsunami from which there is no escape. But, amazingly, here is where my value rises. I can’t compete with Google or Wikipedia when it comes to recounting the details of JFK’s assassination. But I am good at first-hand stories. I lived it. I know where I was when I heard he’d been shot, what it felt like in the succeeding days as I led my young family and our first congregation through a national trauma. Other generations can read the details in history books. But Google or Wikipedia cannot explain it first hand. ‘Those who were not there’ need these first hand stories from those who have gone before, to act as pillars in their own lives when facing cataclysmic events.

 

Much of life remains the same for every generation. Only the faces, the names, the places change. This, too, is where an older Christian with deep faith, life experience and gathered wisdom becomes a gift. When facing his or her own difficulties, broken relationships, disappointment and failure, a young person may be willing to talk to their peers, but the gift most often of greatest value will be found somewhere in the 60+ crowd.

So back to the question: did my value just go up or down? Well, surprise. I checked the stock market and it looks like a good day. I had opportunity to spend an hour with a young man devoted to reaching youth and young families for Christ. Chalk that up as time well spent. And my six-month-old great grandson fell asleep this afternoon with his head nestled on my chest. When our daughter (his grandmother) looked in, she smiled, then walked back to the kitchen where I heard her tell her mother with a chuckle, “They’re bonding.”

 

All in all, I think my value went up today. Happy birthday! How about you?

 

 

 

 

 

Ward