By Glenn B. Havumaki
Wisdom is with the ages, and understanding in length of days. (Job 12:12)
“Isn’t it a shame that such a talented young man who can play the guitar and has so many other gifts doesn’t work with youth?” This was on person’s response when I interviewed for the position of chaplain at Elim Park Baptist Home.
This attitude is reflected too frequently today. Why be so concerned about senior adults? The youth are our future.
Are we laying aside the present (aged) for the sake of the future (youth)? In my opinion, yes! Society says that a person isn’t worth much after age 65, and sadly this is parroted by our churches.
We hear, “The youth are our future. They are the church of tomorrow.” True. But is the whole program of the church to be slanted toward the youth, leaving the senior adults out in the cold? I hope not!
While the advertising world glorifies youth and their achievements, it’s inexcusable that we attach less worth to the aged and their achievements. In our church life we dare not limit our priorities to looking for a youth pastor and maintaining a church bus to haul children to Sunday school.
Where is the church when the hair turns gray? As our population includes more and more people over age 65, our churches must refocus their areas of ministry. Rather than forcing senior adults into retirement from church life, we should be looking at them as valuable resources of wisdom and experience which should be funneled into church work. “Wisdom is with the aged, and understanding in length of days” (Job 12:12).
Old age doesn’t necessarily mean a diminution of creativity and usefulness. “Titian completed his masterpiece, The Battle of Lepanto, at age 95. Benjamin Franklin invented bifocals at 78. At 90 Pablo Casals still played the cello as no other man had. Carl Sandburg wrote Remembrance Rock at 70.” Our churches need to help senior adults accept the inevitable losses of old age, to face impending death, to grow in God’s grace, to apply God’s promise: “Even to your old age I am He, and to gray hairs I will carry you. I have made, and I will bear; I will carry and will save” (Isa. 46:4). There are a number of practical things a church can do to help its senior adults: Show the senior adults they are needed. Don’t cast them aside as a burden, but look at them as an opportunity. Don’t allow them to experience the fear of the psalmist: “Do not cast me off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength is spent” (71:9). I had the privilege of growing up in a home where Grandma lived with us until shortly before she died. Because of the warm relationship we share, I hope my daughter will have opportunity to learn to love and enjoy her grandparents. If not, I hope an older couple at church will be willing to act as adopted grandparents so that our Katrina will learn to relate to these precious older people. When the hair turns gray, show respect and honor to those we call senior adults. Instill in them a sense of usefulness. Encourage them to be involved in a place of service. “A hoary head is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life” (Prov. 16:31). “The glory of young men is their strength, but the beauty of old men is their gray hair” (Prov. 20:29). [1] Evelyn Stenbock, “The Spouse Gap,” Handbook for Caring Christians, p.20.
We are already out of the picture. I am 71 and am finishing my BA at Oklahoma Wesleyan University because I have over the years cared for many members of my family, now they are gone and I thought I would try and fulfill a personal dream of getting a BA and Masters from Wesleyan and maybe work in the church somewhere. I can go work in the nursery is the answer I received. I worked as an Insurance Agent and trainer for many years, over 30 years in public speaking but now I am no longer capable of doing anything except babysit the infants.
What a waste of my experience and desire to serve, but on a happy note I am changing denominations and churches this next week, they are ready and happy to use my experience in the Messianic Movement. Of course with our experience of life we know that when you are handed a lemon go make lemonade out of it.
Would still like to use my knowledge more but will let the Lord lead and will probably have more work than I can handle by the time I have finished my Masters. Love your articles and website, keep working on this real problem, just because we are older doesn’t mean we are useless or senile.
M, Thank you for sharing your journey with us! We hear about so many who are turned away by their churches–often the very ones they helped to build–and recognize the pain that comes with such an experience. And, yet, we are also hearing of those who are welcoming in second half saints, seeking to integrate the rich stores of experience and passion. As a note of encouragement, let us say that Now is the perfect time to pursue your dreams and calling, and to share your story of rediscovery with whomever will hear it, young and old alike. Thank you for your comments.
The CASA Network